Have you ever noticed your loved ones’ eyes glazing over as you talk to them? Or perhaps you have trouble getting people to return your phone calls… Most people who talk too much already know that they do it, and just keep forgetting to work on their habit. Unfortunately, there are people who don’t see it as a problem, and don’t think that they have anything to work on in this area. Talking too much is not necessarily a problem, but when it starts to annoy or frustrate your friends and loved ones, you should start looking at paying attention to how much you are talking.
I am sure that you have heard the saying, “You have 2 ears and only 1 mouth for a reason!” Well, this saying became a saying for a reason as well – it is true, and should be applied to our daily lives. How many times have you been frustrated when talking to someone, when you notice that they are thinking about their reply, rather than really listening to what you have to say? Or perhaps you’ve noticed that some people only ask the question, “how are you” just do they can open up conversation and tell you how they are. These things can be irritating, and especially when the same people do these things over and over again. People need to feel validated, and a great way to validate someone’s feelings is to listen to them.
If you are like me, and you have a problem with talking too much, you should not feel embarrassed or insecure about it; instead, resolve to fix the problem, and don’t worry about what other people are thinking about you when you do talk too much. Most people won’t look down on you in any way for doing it, but will just be mildly annoyed – very mildly! Learn to think for at least a few seconds before you speak. This will give you a chance to plan what you want to say, and think about how much you actually need to say to get your point across. If you have a funny story to tell, limit yourself to just that story, and leave the other ones that pop into your mind for another time.
If you need motivation to curb your talking, think about the risks of letting yourself go in conversation. None of us are perfect, and if we keep on talking, eventually we will find ourselves saying things that we may regret saying later on. Gossip, rumors and idle talk can start this way, and if you do not stop yourself from giving into the temptations of these things, you will soon find yourself the proud owner of a reputation! Gossip hurts everyone involved, and can ruin friendships, marriages and family relationships. Practice reining in your tongue before it becomes a destructive tool. When you talk, make sure that your words build people up instead of tearing them down, and when you get that feeling that the person you are speaking to has had enough of the subject, stop talking!